Fear of a Mirror 12/09/19
For some a mirror is simplistic. You pose, you check, you take selfies, you prepare oneself for whatever the occasion. A way to ensure that the outfit, hair and makeup is in place or near as perfect as possible. For some, even this uncomplicated item, can be heavy with dread. For me, the mirror represents an image from years ago when I was a young girl of just seventeen. The hurt bled red from the switch induced beating running like rivers down my bare legs. Pain was a strong indicator of what I could not see on my back, but knew was there, nonetheless. The order was given for me to look in the mirror, as he shouted out every negative thing that could be found about my frail body. The image of a young girl beaten and bleeding, a body that trembled with fear and shame, an image that reflected the terror of a single moment. The gravity of that image continues to be inescapable at times, albeit many years later. The moment that created this shattered girl with the constant repeated words of “nobody wants you” would become the catalyst for change. I ran away from home that day.
I ran bleeding.
I ran fearing.
I just ran. The miracle is that I survived. I met strangers that hid me from my father. I worked for people who gave me more than I could have ever asked for. I found Grace. Grace is what has allowed me to heal. The scars, the memories are still there, but that little girl in the mirror is fading and the person that God wants me to become is emerging. You never know what battles some may face with everyday little things. One most often, does not understand the power of a kind word, a helping hand, or welcoming spirit to someone who is broke.
I was a victim. Key word WAS.
Now I am an advocate. I have a voice. My past will not be what defines me. God has given me a new purpose. One that uses the chains of my past to help others through their experiences. God has a purpose for me. God has a purpose for you. We all have our scars and moments that we wish to escape. Life is a journey with high peaks and low valleys. The bible says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18- Are you feeling crushed, or brokenhearted? Scripture says the Lord is close. Hold fast to your Faith, in all things. God can and will provide Grace to heal and promote the person that He sees in you. Allow God to use you in a way that heals not only your hurts, but the hurts of others. Be encouraged!
Phillipians 4:13
"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneths me"